I realize the title of this inaugural article might come across as a bit… I don’t know… vinegary? But I hope that by its end, the vibe you get will be more encouraging than that – so please read on.

I’m convinced that one of the most fundamental lessons a leader can learn – one that should be learned as early as possible, ideally prior to taking on one’s first leadership position – is that a big part of a leader’s job is to redirect the limelight away from him- or herself and towards the people s/he leads.

This is difficult, I admit. Let’s just acknowledge something right up front: the people most likely advance through the leadership ranks may not always be those who naturally shy away from the spotlight, and who hate being the center of attention. But even if you don’t feel a constant craving for attention and affirmation, there’s a good chance that you still don’t really mind those things – and I think it’s safe to say that giving credit to others and shifting positive attention to other members of one’s team may not come completely naturally to anyone.

Nothing is quite as demoralizing to an organization as a leader who acts as if the organization is an extension of his own ego. Don’t be that boss.

But here’s the thing: nothing is quite as demoralizing to an organization as a leader who acts as if the organization is an extension of his own ego. Having a boss who constantly needs affirmation is exhausting. Having a boss who hogs the spotlight is embarrassing. Having a boss who takes credit for the accomplishments of others is infuriating. Don’t be that boss.

Now, it’s easy to say that leadership is “not about you.” But what does that mean in practice? If you have a boss who really understands that it’s “not about her,” what does her leadership look like?

I was blessed to report for seven years to a library dean who exemplified this understanding, and who modeled its application beautifully. Here are several important things she did and didn’t do:

• She never bragged about her own accomplishments. I can’t think of a single time that she drew attention to her own achievements or took credit for the library’s successes – despite the fact that her achievements were significant and the library’s successes were many, and despite the fact that her leadership was a major contributor to those successes. 
• She never missed an opportunity to brag about other people’s accomplishments. Whenever someone noted the library’s outstanding physical facilities, collections, services, or reputation, she found ways to point out how the work and talents of others in the organization had made those things outstanding. And she actively sought out opportunities to praise members of her team – in specific ways that showed both her awareness and her understanding of their work – to people outside the library.
• She gave her team opportunities to share their accomplishments with each other. In monthly all-staff meetings, the last agenda item was always an open invitation for people to tell her, publicly, about the cool things they were working on or unusual achievements in their units. She would walk out into the audience to stand close by those who were talking, and expressed her appreciation sincerely. There was a double genius to this approach: for one thing, we all got to see her express appreciation to our colleagues in a public forum, which is always healthy. For another, this practice helped create a culture of openness about accomplishment within the organization, which was valuable in itself – and, also importantly, it raised our awareness of the great things that others in the library were accomplishing.

In connection with that last bullet point, there’s an insight from the realm of child development that I think has particular relevance to leadership: praising your child for something specific can be very helpful and positive, but he’s more likely to believe your praise when he overhears you praising him to someone else. Why? In part, because your child knows that you have a vested interest in making him feel good about himself. (He may even have noticed that you tend to exaggerate his virtues a little bit, especially when talking to him.) However, your child will generally assume that you tell the truth to other adults. If he hears you telling another adult that he’s a talented artist or really helpful with his siblings, he’s more likely to take it as a real and meaningful assessment of his qualities than if you just tell him those things directly.

In an organizational context, that principle works too: we take praise for our work more seriously when we overhear it being communicated to others. So finding opportunities to praise our team members in the presence of other team members can be especially powerful.

Now, I don’t claim for a moment to be as good at these things as my former boss is. But during the years I reported to her, I gained a deep appreciation for the importance of directing the spotlight of attention and appreciation away from myself and towards those I lead. I’m always trying to do that more consistently, and I’m always looking for better ways to do it.

Takeaways and Action Items

1.        The next time someone praises your library, respond by telling them about someone in the library other than you who does things to make it praiseworthy.

2.        The more you draw attention to the good work of others, the more it will reflect well on you as a leader. 

3.        Look for programmatic and structural ways to draw public attention to the work of under-recognized people in your library. 

4. Praise your people to others – sometimes in your people’s presence, and sometimes behind their backs.